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Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.

Mark Twain

Business

Prosperity is the best protector of principle.

Mark Twain

Prosperity

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Mark Twain

Congress

Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.

Mark Twain

Education

Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

Such is the human race, often it seems a pity that Noah... didn't miss the boat.

Mark Twain

Pity

Race

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

Mark Twain

Congress

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

The educated Southerner has no use for an 'R', except at the beginning of a word.

Mark Twain

Beginning

Word

The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.

Mark Twain

Race

Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.

Mark Twain

Work

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.