In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom.
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.
I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
Room service? Send up a larger room.
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths.
There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, "Yes," you know he is a crook.
No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.