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Ambidextrous, adj.: Able to pick with equal skill a right-hand pocket or a left.

Ambrose Bierce

Right

Skill

Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.

Ambrose Bierce

State

An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

Ambrose Bierce

Taste

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.

Ambrose Bierce

Money

Draft

Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Ambrose Bierce

Talking

Thinking

Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.

Ambrose Bierce

Irreverence

Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.

Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.

Ambrose Bierce

Purpose

Animals

Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.

Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

Genealogy, n. An account of one's descent from a man who did not particularly care to trace his own.

Ambrose Bierce

Care

Man

Genius - to know without having learned; to draw just conclusions from unknown premises; to discern the soul of things.

Ambrose Bierce

Genius

Soul

Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.