I have wit in my work and a sense of humor, but I do not use irony in any way.

You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.

What is this powerful have over my tub? Surely, I am transfixed by your firecracker charm and your suspended electrified wit.

Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit.

My dad's sense of humor was direct and sometimes surreal - his quick wit is well known amongst our family and friends. He raised me on Spike Jones records and W.C. Fields movies, and his sense of humor fell somewhere in between.

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself, but in so doing, he identifies himself with people - that is, people everywhere, not for the purpose of taking them apart, but simply revealing their true nature.

Comedy has to be done en clair. You can't blunt the edge of wit or the point of satire with obscurity. Try to imagine a famous witty saying that is not immediately clear.

In Paris, you learn wit, in London you learn to crush your social rivals, and in Florence you learn poise.

Don't set your wit against a child.

Far less envy in America than in France, and far less wit.

Wit lies in recognizing the resemblance among things which differ and the difference between things which are alike.

Wit consists in knowing the resemblance of things that differ, and the difference of things that are alike.

Our erected wit maketh us to know what perfection is.