I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network was already committed to doing something with him, so I skipped a couple of hundred steps right there.

Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm Jewish.

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War.

I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not even interesting to me.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then.

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.

When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name, I would walk around the streets and occasionally I would see an alcove or something. And I'd think, that'll be good, that'll be a good spot for me when I'm homeless.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with my aunt and my cousins right next door to me, with the door open, with neighbors walking in and out, with people yelling at each other all the time.

It's not every day that you get to be affectionate around something, it just doesn't happen that often.

Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised.