Lily Tomlin quotes | Thousands Of Quotes

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Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we're schizophrenic?

Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?

What is reality, anyway? Just a collective hunch.

The best mind-altering drug is the truth.

Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.

Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.

The problem with winning the rat race is you're still a rat.

The road to success is always under construction.

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company.

Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.

Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.