Chris Rock quotes

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There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
Chris Rock
Women
Food
Compliments
Water
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
Chris Rock
Business
Want
Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.
Chris Rock
People
Gay
Right
Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
Control
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
Chris Rock
Life
Now
Right
Stupidity
Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.
Chris Rock
Being
Drugs
Favorite
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Chris Rock
Woman
School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.
Chris Rock
Man
School
A man is only as faithful as his options.
Chris Rock
Man
Options
A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.
Chris Rock
College
Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.
Chris Rock
Sports
People
Population
states
United
Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.
Chris Rock
People
Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!
Chris Rock
Dance
American
Singing
Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?
Chris Rock
Love
Being
Famous
You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.
Chris Rock
Taxes