They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it's not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance.

Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along.

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.

Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces.

The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it.

The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp.

The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.

It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. Of course, I could be wrong.

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.

It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewere, would much rather you weren't doing.

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.