Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

I feel it is time that I also pay tribute to my four writers, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.

It's like being a Knight of the Garter. It's an honor, but it doesn't hold up anything.

Life is like a cash register, in that every account, every thought, every deed, like every sale, is registered and recorded.

Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.

The proud man counts his newspaper clippings, the humble man his blessings.

Pride is an admission of weakness; it secretly fears all competition and dreads all rivals.

Show me your hands. Do they have scars from giving? Show me your feet. Are they wounded in service? Show me your heart. Have you left a place for divine love?

Baloney is flattery laid on so thick it cannot be true, and blarney is flattery so thin we love it.

Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery.