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What they're not ready for is guys like you and I and Nails and all the other gnarly gnarlingtons in my life, that we are high priests, Vatican assassin warlocks. Boom. Print that, people. See where that goes.

Charlie Sheen

Life

People

What is a normal childhood? We weren't rich, we were pretty middle-class. My dad survived from job to job; with him taking care of so many relatives, he couldn't save any money.

We're going to shoot one Polaroid per show. I'm going to sign this before it even develops because I know that once it develops with my signature on it, it's worth a fortune. I'll make this a work of magic warlock art.

Usually in a battle sequence when a bomb is going off, you forget you're acting.

Uncertainty is a sign of humility, and humility is just the ability or the willingness to learn.

There was a reason my first substantial role after rehab was to play a maniac whose personal story ended badly. I knew what it was like to go those dark places. I played a guy who died as a result of his abuse.

I've spent, I think, close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold.

Charlie Sheen

Gold

I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.

Charlie Sheen

Fire

Words

I don't have time for their judgement and their stupidity and you know they lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children and look at their loser lives and then they look at me and they say, 'I can't process it' well, no, you never will stop trying, just sit back and enjoy the show. You know?

But you can't focus on things that matter if all you've been is asleep for forty years. Funny how sleep rhymes with sheep. You know.

Dad almost died of a heart attack in the middle of making Apocalypse Now, the biggest movie of his life. It doesn't make you want to jump into that business.

Dad kept us out of school, but school comes and goes. Family is forever.

Duh! So, we're asking you now, what are some of your favorite lines that this warlock brain produced?

Charlie Sheen

Favorite

Now

Fame is empowering. My mistake was that I thought I would instinctively know how to handle it. But there's no manual, no training course.

For now, I'm just going to hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here, but I sure like the view.